One of my biggest fears (besides cockroaches and men dressed as clowns and Santa Clauses) is the fear of failure. Till now, whatever I've done, I've done it well. If I know that I'm not going to be good at doing something, then I just won't venture into doing it. Simple. Taking risks, for me, is like suicide. I'm scared that if I take a risk, it might be a huge mistake. What if I've made the wrong decision ?
I fear making the wrong decision. When I've made a wrong decision, I hold on to the regret and the pain that accompanies it, because I'm scared that if I don't do that, I might make that same mistake again.
I know that these fears of mine are doing me more harm than good. I know that I need to take a few risks, take the plunge, make mistakes , learn and move on. But just the thought of all that makes me feel queasy.
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- The Secret Life of Bees, Sue Monk Kidd
- Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood: A Novel, Rebecca Wells
- Catch 22, Joseph Heller
- Musicophilia, Oliver Sack
- The Last Battle , C. S. Lewis
- The Horse and His Boy
- The Silver Chair , C.S. Lewis
- The Voyage of the Dawn Treader
- Prince Caspian, C.S. Lewis
- The Lion , the Witch and The Wardrobe, C.S. Lewis
- The Magician's Nephew, C. S. Lewis
- Choke , Chuck Palahniuk
- The Grass is Singing , Doris Lessing
- A Spy in the House of Love , Anais Nin *
- Sweet Thursday , John Steinbeck **
- The Great Gatsby , F. Scott Fitzgerald ****
- Interesting times in India , Daniel O'Connor **
- Kafka on the Shore , Haruki Murakami ****
- The House of the Spirits , Isabel Allende *****
- A Man For all Seasons , Robert Bolt *****
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6 comments:
Dearest aRrAck,
I wish I could say something that could take this fear away but I have tons of moments like this too.
I send you hugs and vibes instead and hope in your time, in your way, you shall conquer this fear.
corny as it sounds - there is really nothing to fear but fear itself.
me, thank you.. Its comforting to know that someone's been through the same feelings !
DW, yeah, its so true !
Heya...I know what you mean. But for me it's a bit of a twist - My fear is being successful. After trying so hard and failing to get there - I'm afraid of losing it.
lol back again - a poem i wanted to share with you:
I feared being alone
Until I learned to like
Myself.
I feared failure
Until I realized that I only
Fail when I don't try.
I feared success
Until I realized
That I had to try
In order to be happy
With myself.
I feared people's opinions
Until I learned that
People would have opinions
About me anyway.
I feared rejection
Until I learned to
Have faith in myself.
I feared pain
Until I learned that
it's necessary
For growth.
I feared the truth
Until I saw the
Ugliness in lies.
I feared life
Until I experienced
Its beauty .
I feared death
Until I realized that it's
Not an end, but a beginning.
I feared my destiny,
Until I realized that
I had the power to change
My life.
I feared hate
Until I saw that it
Was nothing more than
Ignorance.
I feared love
Until it touched my heart,
Making the darkness fade
Into endless sunny days.
I feared ridicule
Until I learned how
To laugh at myself.
I feared growing old
Until I realized that
I gained wisdom every day.
I feared the future
Until I realized that
Life just kept getting
Better.
I feared the past
Until I realized that
It could no longer hurt me.
I feared the dark
Until I saw the beauty
Of the starlight.
I feared the light
Until I learned that the
Truth would give me
Strength.
I feared change,
Until I saw that
Even the most beautiful butterfly
Had to undergo a metamorphosis
Before it could fly.
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