Saturday 25 November 2006

I was reading my old diary and found a note that my friend who was in Delhi at that time had sent me along with my old cassettes that I had left behind there. I was going through a really bad time then and she wrote to me saying ' I hope this brings back some of the happiness. In the end its a ll worthwhile. Get stronger. Don't lose yourself in all this cynicism. '

I hope that I haven't lost myself in the cynicism and the bitterness. I worry that I will become so 'strong' that I become hardened. I worry that my heart has become like stone. Things stay etched in it , the very good AND the very bad memories. And sometimes, I think its better to erase the bad things and move on. But then , how can you erase an etching ?
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4 comments:

manjadi said...

so you think there is a contradiction between the get stronger and the dont be cynical?

Sat Nov 25, 05:06:00 am
Tarantismo said...

I wonder... Not necessarily I think. I just think its a thin line between getting stronger and getting hardened.

Sat Nov 25, 05:22:00 am
Fireflies said...

hahaha ive figured out who you are... hehe i love this. i feel like a detective. yes im jobless. i know what u mean abt the pessimism.. it usually envelopes me to such a point, i actually feel scared to get out of its warm clutches. what do can one say about onesself when negativity makes us feel comfortable?!?

Sun Nov 26, 03:22:00 pm
Tarantismo said...

Ya it really does get comfortable being negative and pessimistic. But I keep thinking that I'm missing out on something by being so negative.. negative about being negative...
help help help !!!!!

Tue Nov 28, 10:38:00 am

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