Bangalore to Chennai to Bristol to...

Links I liked:

2009-08-19T11:00:00.001+01:00

1. This one was on last night. Who needs spiders and kryptonite when you've got the wordofgaaawd !

2. If you think you've been having a bad day, this should make you feel better. If not, then you can always join in and see what everyone else thinks.

Fmylife

3. New blog-find.

Funny and its not all about cricket.

Prem Panicker's blog

I especially liked how he wrote this one

2009-08-13T23:47:00.003+01:00

As part of the very generous scholarship that I'm on for my Masters, I get a fully-paid ticket to return to India. However, they require me to leave by the end of September. Which complicates things substantially since I was planning to head back home with T in Dec.

So while discussing the sudden change of plans, one option under consideration was that - I go home on fully-paid ticket in September.
- Return in October to start off on PhD.
- And then leave again with T in Dec.

My heart sank at the thought of being away from T for a few weeks in September. And the first thing that crossed my mind was 'I'll make cutlets and keep them in the freezer for him to eat while I'm away.' !!

Cutlets? Freezer? When did I become this woman??

Stereotyping…

2009-06-10T09:05:00.002+01:00

A couple of days back, I walked over to T’s university to walk back with him after his work, mainly for the exercise.

Now that it’s summer here, I’ve been gleefully wearing my spaghetti tops and sleeveless cotton tops. So I decided to wear a slightly risqué black top. It’s a fine, light, knitwear top with a low-neck which was a little transparent but not overly so. Teasingly transparent, I'd like to think.

We happened to meet one of T’s colleagues at the university and she joined us for a cup of tea.

The next day, at work, T’s colleague (who’s French) asks him, ‘ Did Tarantismo know her top was transparent yesterday?’

And T says, ‘Yes, she did’.

To which she replies saying, ‘Oh, I thought Indian women always cover-up their bodies.’

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

money matters

2009-06-04T21:49:00.001+01:00

Application for Summer School in lovely Lima – Accepted

Application for funding to go all the way to lovely Lima for Summer School – Unsuccessful

What to do what to do… ? Oh to win that 1000 pound lucky draw…. sigh..

Crochet time

2009-06-03T18:33:00.003+01:00

I was looking forward to starting on some knitting/crocheting after moving to UK given the wide choice of yarn I’d have here. I’ve enjoyed crocheting and have been doing it on and off for a few years now. And T bought me this lovely book - The Happy Hooker – which has been a huge help in navigating through the mind-blogging array of yarns available here.

I bought this roll of yarn about six months back hoping to work on a crochet project over the Christmas break.

My crochet projects till now have been handkerchiefs/doilies. This time I wanted to do something bigger. So I decided to go in for a shawl. But I didn’t want anything too complicated, so I finally settled on a very basic ‘Shelly’ shawl.

Work was started in December. I went at it for a few days. Got distracted with other stuff. Assignments started piling up and exams came. So the project took a back seat and it’s only now that I’ve been able to get back to it. And this is what I’ve got so far…

There’s still more to be done. And tassels as well. And then TAN TA DAAAAAA !!!!

2009-05-28T13:10:00.002+01:00

I would have liked to post this in my Facebook page, but then again, I have all my little kiddy cousins as friends. Well, not so kiddy really, but they’ll always be kiddies to me.
Informative and funny. Enjoy!

One year on

2009-05-27T10:02:00.001+01:00

L came and went like a whirlwind. And as This Fish put it, she was like a ‘life-raft in a sea of boring’.

Sunday was also our (T & me, not L & me!) first wedding anniversary. One whole year. Whew !! I’m still getting used to having a ‘husband’ and it’s already been a year. I still remember reading in Beks’ blog that the first year is probably the toughest year. So I had prepared myself for the worst. But honestly, it wasn’t bad at all. We did have our fair share of fights, but they weren’t as bad as they could have been.

Anyway, this is for T. For making this year so much fun. And for patiently enduring me while I went about the ‘enthralling fun of overhauling you’ (P.S. its not over yet ).

Well after all, Pickering, I'm an ordinary man,
Who desires nothing more than an ordinary chance,
to live exactly as he likes, and do precisely what he wants...
An average man am I, of no eccentric whim,
Who likes to live his life, free of strife,
doing whatever he thinks is best, for him,
Well... just an ordinary man...
BUT, Let a woman in your life and your serenity is through,
she'll redecorate your home, from the cellar to the dome,
and then go on to the enthralling fun of overhauling you...
Let a woman in your life, and you're up against a wall,
make a plan and you will find,
that she has something else in mind,
and so rather than do either you do something else
that neither likes at all You want to talk of Keats and Milton,
she only wants to talk of love,
You go to see a play or ballet, and spend it searching
for her glove, Let a woman in your life
and you invite eternal strife,
Let them buy their wedding bands for those anxious little hands...
I'd be equally as willing for a dentist to be drilling
than to ever let a woman in my life, I'm a very gentle man,
even tempered and good natured
who you never hear complain,
Who has the milk of human kindness
by the quart in every vein,
A patient man am I, down to my fingertips,
the sort who never could, ever would,
let an insulting remark escape his lips
Very gentle man...
But, Let a woman in your life,
and patience hasn't got a chance,
she will beg you for advice, your reply will be concise,
and she will listen very nicely, and then go out
and do exactly what she wants!!!
You are a man of grace and polish,
who never spoke above a hush,
all at once you're using language that would make
a sailor blush, Let a woman in your life,
and you're plunging in a knife,
Let the others of my sex, tie the knot around their necks,
I prefer a new edition of the Spanish Inquisition
than to ever let a woman in my life I'm a quiet living man,
who prefers to spend the evening in the silence of his room,
who likes an atmosphere as restful as
an undiscovered tomb,
A pensive man am I, of philosophical joys,
who likes to meditate, contemplate,
far for humanities mad inhuman noise,
Quiet living man....
But, let a woman in your life, and your sabbatical is through,
in a line that never ends comes an army of her friends,
come to jabber and to chatter
and to tell her what the matter is with YOU!,
she'll have a booming boisterous family,
who will descend on you en mass,
she'll have a large wagnarian mother,
with a voice that shatters glass,
Let a woman in your life,
Let a woman in your life,
Let a woman in your life I shall never let a woman in my life.

‘Let a Woman in your Life’ from My Fair Lady

Friends

2009-05-20T19:17:00.001+01:00

There's this concept in economics called Existence Value. It’s the value that you attach to something simply because it is there, and you know it exists. Like the Himalayas or clean green countryside or flying squirrels or Gael Garcia Bernal. You may not really use it yourself, but just the knowledge that it 'exists' adds to your utility.

And I think that's one of the many ways I value my friends. When I was in Madras, I didn't spend all my free time with friends. But the fact that I did have that option was a huge bonus. Having people to make plans with and knowing that if I wanted to go for a movie, or needed company for shopping expeditions, I’d always have it, is such a comfort. And that’s what I really miss now. The ease which comes with being around people I’ve known for so long. The knowledge that they’re around…

Sigh. Anyway, the weekend beckons. I’ll be done with my exams and better , even better than better, L is dropping by for the weekend, en route to New York. I’m hoping to squeeze in a quick visit to Bath and then lots of time in London, especially Camden Market. Hot chocolate fudge on a cold winter morning, as someone once described L. This is one desperately awaited hot chocolate fudge !

2009-05-19T11:37:00.004+01:00

When we were kids, everytime we went to our grandparents' house, we would be greeted by a string of cousins, aunts and uncles. But no matter who or what was there, the first thing we had to do was to go and see our grand parents. We had go and give 'sthuthi' followed by kisses on both cheeks. When we were young, it was more of a task that my parents made us do - 'Go see M.ammachi' , and we'd troop off , a little reluctantly, leaving behind all the cousins and the games they were playing, for a while..

For the last eight years or so, it's just been my grandmom. And as we grew older, the time with my grandmom no longer needed to be forced. Coming back from school, college, we used to look forward to going to meet her, to sit with her and tell her all the news. And she'd eagerly listen to our stories, her face brimming with pride.

Grandparents are your biggest fans. When I was working, my grandmom was so proud of me and the fact that I had a good job. And she used to say, 'yes, let her work and discover things. She should have these experiences'. And when she came to know how miserable I was at work, 'tell her to leave. Why does she have to work at all? There's no need for her to do this. She's got home and all of us. Tell her to come back.'

Thank you for the unconditional love you gave us. For showing me the meaning of grace and wisdom. The thought that the next time I go back home, you're no longer going to be there breaks my heart. That really was the last time I saw you, and I remember at that time, hoping against hope, that when I came back for Christmas, you'd still be there for me to hold your hands and give stuthi and kisses to.

Being married - tidbit 2

2009-05-14T08:31:00.002+01:00

When one of my cousins came to know that T & I would both be students atleast for the first year of our married life, this is what she had to say:
'That's so cool. That'll be like you guys are 'living together' !'

T and I have a game we play. Sometimes, when we're sitting around, doing our own thing, I turn to T and ask him to marry me. He frowns, thinks for some time and says no, its too early or something like that. And then I beg him, 'please please please. it'll be so nice and so much easier. and my parents will like you and we can tell them that we stay together' . T thinks about it for a while and the game continues for a while like that..

I'm now bored of being the one who does the asking. So, I've asked T that it's his turn now to do the begging and instructed him to 'surprise' me with the question!

Yes, that's how we entertain ourselves.

Being Married - tidbit 1

2009-05-11T03:30:00.001+01:00

I haven't blogged much about married life here. A lot of it is because I'm still trying to figure it out myself. Its going to be the big One Year since T & I tied the knot and I don't think its still fully sunk in for me that I'm a married woman.

The first 2 weeks after our wedding, the whole jingbang were at home - his brothers and wives , who'd also been married for less than 6 months and his parents. Both T's brothers had 'love-marriages'.. So for all practical purposes, they had been 'married unofficially' for much longer than a year.

So there were moments when I did feel a bit out of sorts. These 'newly-weds' around me just got along so well, they knew each other so well. Whereas T & I, we were still getting used to the mundane things like eating in front of each other ! And T's mom would ask her other daughter-in-laws casual questions like 'Does /your husband/ like to eat ____ ?' And they'd have an answer, of course, since they'd known their husbands for more than a year! (But now I wonder if they were just making it up? hmmmm) And when she'd ask me, I'd be really puzzled. Hello, how am I supposed to know that?!!

Similarities

2009-05-08T11:09:00.003+01:00

Yummy yummy Chicken in Milk...
This has become a favourite in our house.

Yummy yummy Chick on Couch....
This will always be a favourite in our house . :)

You can find the recipe for Chicken in Milk here.

Our visitor

2009-05-05T21:35:00.003+01:00

There's an ant under a glass lid, with a table lamp aimed straight at it on our study table.
This is part of T's macro-photography venture. Last time it was a wood louse. Before that, spiders. And before that, a dead fly.

T's trying to acclimitise the ant to the light. And I'm trying to push T into feeding the poor ant who's been under that lid for a few hours now..... He's accusing me of anthropomorphising it. I'm telling him, 'Yes, that ant could very well be you'...

I think I'll sneak in a teeny-weeny sugar cube for that poor ant...

Deja vu - with a little help from beer

2009-05-04T10:09:00.003+01:00

This weekend, to celebrate the last day of classes and having finally submitted all my assignments, I went out for drinks with two of my classmates. I still can't get over the fact that they serve alcohol IN CAMPUS !

I wanted to try out different beers. So I started with a pint of Kronenberg. Halfway through, I was pretty buzzed. Loud music. Shouting ourselves hoarse to be heard over it. Random people around having a good time. Dim lights. Nice buzz. Deja vu...

I had to leave early to catch the last train back to Bristol. So while I waited for the bus to take me to the train station, I chatted with T over the phone. I was slightly buzzed. T was far away telling me about his day. I was giggly. Felt like weekends in Chennai when I'd come back home with a happy-high and chat with T.

Thank God for beer.

2009-04-30T10:11:00.003+01:00

During a very stressful time, I wished that the swine flu would hit UK and warnings would be issued and we'd be quarantined and then I wouldn't have to submit my assignments and the exams would be cancelled...
And now I'm feeling so so guilty.
I'm a horrible person...

Near the London Eye

2009-04-07T08:38:00.001+01:00

One of the reasons why I want to go back to London !

Family Dynamics

2009-04-03T12:37:00.002+01:00

It’s strange how relationships with parents evolve over time. When I was a kid, my father was my best friend. I would hang on to every word he said. I would hold his hand when we went out and anytime I had a problem, he was the one I’d talk to.

Amma was my brother’s best friend. They used to be the ones who’d do the wild and spontaneous things, while Appan and I would stand and watch and have a good laugh at them occassionally. I remember when we moved into our new flat. It had a little garden with a small pond and Amma and AA (my brother) decided to clean it out and put in some water plants and stuff. And since the local aquarium didn’t have the kind of plants they wanted they drove all around Kottayam, inspecting flooded paddy fields until they found what they were looking for. AA walked through all the mud and slush to pull out a few plants from that field.

They’re the pair that get things done. The two of them have boundless energy and once they decide to do something they go all out with it. They jump right in and learn as they go.

Appa and I. We were the talkers, the thinkers. We used to talk about books and poems and music. And on the rare occasion that we do decide to do something, we’d read up about it and debate the pros and cons and think of all the things that could go wrong. And finally we would take a few tentative steps, and often get bored after a while and that would be the end of that.

As we grew older, Appan and AA started to have all their man-to-man talks about cars and gadgets and cameras and computer software. And when the new house was being built, AA bought Appan a diary with targets and plans for what was to be done and when. And with AA's energetic enthusiasm and Appan’s thorough scrutiny of all plans, they were quite the team.

Amma and I on the other hand , have been becoming closer and closer. Amma has always been slightly reticent. She’s always calm and I’ve never seen her angry or losing her cool. When I was young, I mistook her lack-of-moodiness for being distant and unfeeling. But over time, I’ve come to understand that that is who she is and it is not a conscious decision. I have understood that the things she’s experienced and seen as a child have made her who she is. And I no longer love her despite that. I love her for it. I love her for the calm and stability that she brought into our lives.

I remember when Appa used to go into his brooding or sour moods, I used to tell myself that I should be like AA and choose Amma as my Best Friend because she would never be off-mood. It makes me laugh when I think of it ! Now they’re both my ‘best friends’.

I had the longest phone call with Amma. Exchanged gossip and recipes and I introduced her to my latest obsession. And at the end of it, despite the terrible homesickness, I felt all warm and fuzzy inside…

Love is in the Air !

2009-03-29T21:53:00.001+01:00

What T & I saw on our walk today :

Any other catchy titles for this?

a hair cut, finally !

2009-03-28T09:51:00.004Z

After walking past the Bridgewater House salon three times, I finally mustered up enough courage to walk inside the beauty parlour and book myself an appointment.

Why was I scared? I don't know. I'm quite silly that way. I had images of being turned away rudely, or images of me doing/saying something really embarrassing. Thankfully, I none of these became a reality.

The hair has been cut - not too short. A razor cut , which I worry is going to look messy once the effect of all the mousse and blow-drying has worn away.
Yes, I had mousse on my hair for the first time. I don't care for the stiffness once its dried-up but I do think its worth the volume that it adds to my normally-limp hair.

I couldn't get my eyebrows done since the lady who normally does it wasn't in. But now that I've overcome the Fear of Walking into A Salon, I can always go later...

facebook addict

2009-03-25T18:12:00.003Z

Resisting the urge to reply to friend's wall post on Facebook five minutes after she wrote it.
Just so that people won't realise I'm permanently refreshing my facebook page...
I'll give it another 5 minutes...

Watching one too many courtroom dramas...

2009-03-16T10:38:00.005Z

In other news, the taxi that's usually parked outside our house was broken in to last night. The windows of the cab were shattered. I saw it when I woke up this morning.

I was hoping for some excitement. Some cops coming over and questioning.
"Did you hear anything unusual last night?"
"What time did you and your husband go to bed?"
"Were you both alone? Do you have anyone to support the fact that you were in your house all of yesterday evening?"
"Have you noticed anything/anyone suspicious in your neighbourhood?"

And the questions would continue and I'd be delayed for my test today. I imagined walking to the department and telling my professor the whole story and asking for extra time, with my classmates listening eagerly on. What excitement.

I keep thinking that one day I'll be an important witness to some crime. I imagine sitting on the dock and being questioned. 'What time was it , who was with you , what did you hear?' etc etc... So anytime I hear anything unusual, I always note the time. Just in case. And then I imagine myself in the witness dock. 'Mrs. ____, can you tell the jury what you heard?'....
What fun !

Anyway, this wasn't the big day. The man inspected the cab for a while and someone else came over. And later on he swept the place clean and drove away....

Damn..

Comic Relief

2009-03-15T11:40:00.005Z

It really is nice to see all the excitement about Comic Relief Day. I love how so many celebrities have gotten involved and how they've made the whole thing so much fun. I love how the British love to make fun of themselves. I'm not too fond of the Russel Brand type crude comedy. I don't find those even remotely funny. But I like the Alan Carr and sometimes Little Britain type of humour. It requires some level of talent to be witty like that.

Anyway, back to Comic Relief. Its interesting to see how charity has been presented in such an entertaining way. They make charity seem fashionable, like a fun thing to do. And the kind of shows that they do, it reaches out to all types of audiences.
Yes, of course, this type of fundraising has its critiques too.
- Couldn't all that money used for hosting the shows be productively used for charitable causes ?
Yes, perhaps. But if these kinds of shows hadn't been done, the same amount of money could not have been raised.
- The celebrities are in there just for the publicity, as T said.
So what ? At the end of the day, their 'selfish' interests are serving some greater cause. Plus the celebrities bring in greater audiences and hence greater awareness and a little bit more money. After all how many of us can deny the fact that when we give for charity, we are, in some sense, doing so to serve our own selfish need to feel good about ourselves ?

I've enjoyed the Comic Relief shows. And more than that, I've been pleasantly taken-aback by how popular it is, and the reach it has. I wonder if something like this will ever happen in India. Imagine mobilising a billion peope.

Membership requirements - wear tattoo stickers...

2009-03-08T17:35:00.003Z

Just spoke to my parents. They had gone for a prayer retreat at the local church. Appa steers clear from these kinds of things, and rightly so, I think.

The priest was ranting and raving about the immoralities of our modern culture and how susceptible we are to the powers of Satan.
For example, the tattoo stickers. The ones you get free with chewing gum.
Wearing those, according to him, is one of the first steps towards joining the Satanic club...
That's something to keep in mind...

This and That

2009-03-05T19:17:00.002Z

Highlight of the Day :
I think I've found someone to accompany me for a hair-cut. One of my classmates also wants to go for a haircut, so yaaay ! Now to find a good place in Bath.
Someone I knew went to Toni & Guy and when she came in to class the next day, some people turned to her saying 'Oh, you're having a bad hair day , aren't you?' !

Now to decide how I want to style my hair.

My Lent decision to abstain from sugar in coffee/tea is going well so far. Though morning coffee is gulped down just so that the caffeine will help wake me up. But now I'm getting what coffee drinkers mean when they scorn instant coffee.

I still have to get used to people greeting me saying 'You alright?'. The first time I heard it, my instinct was to ask 'Why, do I not look alright?' - not in a rude way, but more out of curiousity. Thankfully, I didn't. And I'm slowly getting used to the fact that 'You alright' is a standard way of greeting here.
You alright ? = Hello there = How're you?

Going out

2009-02-26T09:21:00.003Z

Last night I went out for dinner with friends from Uni to celebrate a birthday.
I don't usually go out very often for dinners, more because I stay in Bristol and Uni and classmates are in Bath, and the last train out is 10.30, which is when the night is just getting started.

But dinner was at 7.30 , so I could hang out for a while. We went to a Latin American restaurant Las Iguanas. And now I've finally tried Sangria and had my first plate of Paella. I was a bit wary about ordering a dish with meat AND seafood because I'm a bit squeamish about the meat-seafood combination. But I've ALWAYS wanted to try out Paella and I'm glad I did give it a shot. The rice was tasty but I found the meat a bit flavourless. I'm not sure if its supposed to be like that. I don't think I'll order it again, but I'm glad I tried it out.

It was nice to hang out with classmates. Of course, it was not the SUPERDUPERFUN that was had when I hung with A & L in Zara's. But I've long abandoned hopes of ever recreating even a shadow of that here. All the same, conversation flowed and I got to now more about classmates who are now friends.

It was cathartic , I think, to hang out with a bunch of people and be a bit noisy and eat good food. I'm glad I didn't chicken out of this one.

Today T & I are meeting up with his friends for dinner to bid farewell to Belgian colleague of T's. But they're a bunch of PhDs. I keep teasing T about how they don't know how to have fun :) They all just sit around and drink and talk.
Whereas us Masters, we sit around and drink and talk LOUDLY. Yeah, that's us.

I crave for drunken nights filled with Dumbcharades and silly jokes and dancing. But that shall have to wait. And that's fine. I'm not going to whine anymore about not having exactly that. I can have fun drinking and talking.
:)

2009-01-21T09:53:00.003Z

I understand my own childhood so much better, understand my own parents so much better, and there is so much about myself that I have tried to improve that I didn't know I needed to improve until I was reduced to a late night pair of pacing legs.

So much more makes sense now, and I don't know if there is any other way I could have gained this type of insight into life. And I think this is what a lot of us are talking about when we say it feels like we were let into a secret club, a club we didn't know existed until we got here, like we had no idea there was this much to know until our children showed it all to us.

This post made me want to consider getting that special tummy. Just for a fleeting moment....

You know you're married when...

2009-01-20T12:12:00.002Z

Innocent questions don't seem so innocent anymore....

When aunts / grandmom ask me "Pinne enna vishesham?" loosely translated into
"Any other news? What else is up?"
And I'm thinking
"are they asking me if I'm pregnant or not? "

And when I tell my mom that I've put on my weight and I even have a little bit of a tummy, she responds by asking, "is it a special sort of a tummy?"

Aaah, my family. Bless them...

2009-01-19T21:08:00.005Z

Bunch of kids. Standing around, pretty much blocking the way. We walk by and they start chanting 'losers losers, losers losers'...
And we feel like we can't react to it...

- would we have reacted if we were back home in India? Or would we walk away like we did now?
- would these kids have acted as assoles to everyone or was it just because we were Indians that these kids act like that?
- is it right for us to not react?

This isn't the first time we've had not-so-pleasant encounters with the ever-so vibrant British youth. Hopefully they're just the exception.

Facebook friends

2009-01-17T15:52:00.002Z

I'm getting irritated with near-strangers sending me a Friend Request on Facebook. They're people I've met once/was a junior in college, people who I've had just one conversation with, and never kept in touch after that. I know the point of Facebook is to get back in touch with old friends. But I know that once these guys are added as friends, that's the last I'll hear from them. No hi, no random post on the wall, no sheep-throwing and head-butting , as random and shallow as those may be. The only reason they want to add me is coz they want to get a peek into my life and my photo album. Screw them. They can just wait in the queue. Forever.
I can be really anal sometimes. I know.

2009-01-09T20:54:00.003Z

Why does the mincemeat here taste and smell like horse-poo?

Thinking that the beef & pork mixed- mince would be THE original mince, I bought a packet from Sainsbury's. And today we decided to have spaghetti for dinner. And now the whole house smells of horse-shit. I was nauseous for a while because of the stink. I tried killing the taste with tomato sauce, pesto sauce, red wine. And its all in vain.
Mixed mince, never again..

Old posts that were never posted: Ginger Lime Juice

2009-01-09T17:34:00.001Z

Over the last few weeks, my MIL and I have been busy making juices and jams to put up for a sale. We’ve made about 10 bottles of ginger lime juice. I know the process so well I think I can do it in my sleep now !

This recipe is for 2 litres of juice, so if you don’t want so much, adjust accordingly.

What you need:

Juice of 25 medium sized lemons, give or take a few, depending on the size

Ginger – 125 grams (weigh it after its been cleaned and peeled)

Sugar – 2 kilos (I KNOW , I didn’t know juices were so unhealthy!)

Water – 3 3/4 cups

Step 1:

Peel and clean the ginger and grind it. You can use a mixie to do this or you could use the grinding stone.

Step 2:

In a large vessel, put the sugar and the water. Heat on low flame. Stir occasionally. Once the sugar is fully dissolved, keep on low flame till it has been reduced to a one-string consistency.

Step 3:

Once it’s the correct consistency, add the crushed ginger. Lower the heat and let the ginger cook a bit in the syrup. After about 3-4 minutes, increase the fire until the syrup is boiling. Keep it boiling for another 2 minutes and then remove from fire and immerse the vessel in cold water (preferably with ice cubes in it to make it as cold as possible). This is an absolutely crucial stage in the process. Over-boiling can result in the sugar crystallizing. Make sure to keep stirring while it is being cooled.

Step 4:

Once cooled, add the lime juice into the syrup. Stir in well.

Step 5:

Using a sieve, separate the ginger from the juice. Instead of a sieve, you could also use an old cloth as a sieve and squeeze the juice out.

Step 6:

Bottle it and wait for the guests to come !

indifferent?

2009-01-07T10:42:00.003Z

Has the "U of K" been what I expected it to be like?

I never really had any expectations. But I remember the first few weeks when I was here, I used to feel like I was in an TV serial. There were all these white people around, people with accents and all that and the only time I've experienced that till then was when I watched TV.

So far, I think I'm indifferent to this place. There are moments when I miss home and the comfort that comes from being in my own country and not looking different from the rest of the population. Moments when I wanted to give someone (like a very rude lady at the train station counter or the nasty bus driver) a piece of my mind, but didn't because I felt I had no right to....
And I miss miss miss my friends. Not just my really good friends, but just random people, who'll come into town for a weekend, and you'd meet up for a nice dinner. I miss the ease that comes with being with people you've known for so long. It doesn't help that I'm terrible at making friends....
I miss feeling pretty. I miss having shaped eye-brows and dressing up and wearing sleeveless tops (that's about as fashionable as I get).
I miss the feeling of knowing that I can see my parents whenever I want. That they're just a train journey away.
And that's not all.

But its not all bad, which is why I don't dislike this place. I like the efficiency - things get done, even buses have timings, trains run on time, almost everything is available online and the internet is ohsomuch faster. And there are nice people. My classmates are nice, none of the bitchy clannish kind. Everyone's been helpful and easy to get along with. You just have to separate the chav, oops sorry chaff (!) from the wheat.

So what if I'm married ?

2009-01-03T13:44:00.002Z

being married

2008-08-22T19:13:00.003+01:00

Now that I'm married , I'm learning that:

At times, my mind plays the nastiest tricks on me. If I were in a relationship with someone, I'd tell myself that if I were married to him I'd feel secure. And now that I am married,I tell myself that the only reason he's with me is because we're married.

I can cuddle and cuddle and cuddle all day long

I'm super sensitive - though L says that was already estabilished, I didn't know I was this bad.

I can fight about the most inane things

I do not like social gatherings

I'm needy

I'm clingy

Sometimes, I think I like the 'single' me to the 'married' me.
Maybe it just takes some getting used to...

what's due...

2008-08-05T19:57:00.003+01:00

I'm not going to be able to post for a while 'coz I'm going to stay with my parents for a few days and we don't have broadband as yet. But lots of posts in my mind and lest I forget, here's what's coming up

- how to make ginger lime juice
- an introduction to the the fishes at home (T's place)
- photos of the pug who's left me and gone to a new home .. sigh
- photos of my sweetheart
- my mosaic
- the beekeeping course that my brother and I are going to attend in Kottayam

A Song For You

2008-08-03T04:31:00.002+01:00

For L & A , the truest friends I'll ever have. For being my trampoline.

Now to convince T to get a trampoline so that we can jump in slow motion and be all bohemian-ly romantic.

PS. Alexi Murdoch = very very good.

Random Stuff Because I feel the need to Post - I

2008-08-01T06:38:00.003+01:00

-- What does having the standard Red Carpet welcome with a Green one have to do with being environment friendly?

-- I think eating competitions are an indication of moral decay of a society

-- Why haven't I read the Gitanjali before?

-- And how cool is it that my mom-in-law is the one who gave it to me to read?

-- I made barbecue sauce yesterday and also vazhakka olathiyathe

-- How am I going to get my arms/legs waxed when I'm in the UK ?

-- How am I going to get my eyebrows/upper lip done ?

-- What do I want to be when I grow up?

-- Why do I have to be anything when I grow up?

-- Am I grown up?

-- Why am I always hungry ?

-- It's going to be weird being a married student

-- Butterflies are easier to identify than birds (and a lot more fun)

-- I must get started working on my paper

-- Should I end this post now ?

-- Yeah maybe I should.

-- I wonder if this has put anyone to sleep

-- I wonder if I'll get any comments

-- I shouldn't post for the sake of comments

-- yeah yeah yeah

Divine

2008-07-30T06:34:00.004+01:00

This - Forest Essentials Hydrating Sea Salt Crystal Rose Bath Body Polisher - has become my reason to have a bath.
I didn't even know there was such thing as a Body Polisher, and now that I do, I recommend it highly.

Edit: In reply to the anonymous comments :

Yes it is pricey , and I did feel a bit guilty about buying it. But I have absolutely no regrets and will probably buy a new bottle once this one gets over.

And, you can find it at Anokhi.

2008-07-17T16:09:00.002+01:00

I was worried about how I'd keep myself busy after T left, especially at my in-laws place. But I'm finding out that domestic life can get quite hectic.

My mom-in-law and me have been busy making stuff to put up for a sale in Ernakulam.
So, last week, we made two bottles of pineapple jam, 2 huge bottles of pineapple juice (yes, we have a lot of pineapple here) and today, its mixed fruit jam on the agenda.
Plus, I'm planning to crochet a few hankies and maybe make a doily as well.

And in the midst of that, I told my prof I'd do some work for him as well.

AND we are babysitting a little pug for my brother-in-law in Bangalore. Its just a few weeks old and is the cutest thing ever. I love dogs but so far I've drawn my line with them - no kissing, no sleeping with me, no face contact.
But this little puggy has charmed her way into my bed. Since I haven't been getting too much sleep, last night we decided to leave her in the cage. And I cried just worrying about how she'd be....sigh... Pictures shall be uploaded soon so that you all don't think I'm crazy.

Tomorrow I leave for Madras to spend a few days with the L & A, the women in my life. I have to admit that I'm also looking forward to all the good food. I've been craving for continental food, some chicken cooked in wine sauce, grilled fish, sinful sloppy burger... oh happy days...

wishful thinking

2008-07-11T08:51:00.002+01:00

T heads back to Bristol tomorrow morning. I'm wishing for an earthquake, a cyclone, anything, anything to get the flight postponed...such a terrible cyclone that the flights are postponed till the time that I get my Visa and then we can both leave together..

Fingers crossed.

Risking my anonymity ....

2008-07-09T06:34:00.002+01:00

...to let you all know that the deal's been sealed and all is well (touchwood) !

3 reasons why Jesus Christ is Malayali

2008-04-24T12:27:00.002+01:00

1. He thinks he's the saviour of the world/ son of god.

2. He lived with his mother till he was 30.

3. He thinks his mother's a virgin.

(Courtesy my school principal)

2008-04-09T05:15:00.002+01:00

In an effort to protect the Brazilian rainforest, the government opened a $10m condom factory last week. "The factory, in the Amazon state of Acre, would allow local rubber tappers to profit from the rainforest without destroying it, officials said. Marina Silva, Brazil's environment minister, said the Natex condom would help create "a new pattern of production and a new process of inclusion that would value the forest being left standing".

And last month, the Vatican, in an effort to keep up with the times, updated its list of deadly mortal sins.
Original Mortal Sins:
Pride
Anger
Lust
Envy
Gluttony
Sloth
Greed

Updated to include:
Environmental pollution
Genetic manipulation
Accumulating excessive wealth
Inflicting poverty
Drug trafficking and consumption
Morally debatable experiments
Violation of fundamental rights of human nature

Condoms and birth control = Violation of fundamental rights of human nature as per the Vatican
But Protecting rainforest = very good, pat on your back, as per the vatican

So does this mean that the Brazilian government won't have to go for confession?

A Tarot session - The Fool and me

2008-04-02T05:45:00.004+01:00

One of my roommates is an amateur Tarot reader. A couple of months, she had done a reading for other-roomie and me. It was one of those rainy nights, very windy and the lights had gone out and the candles were out. So perfect ambience for a Tarot session. I really liked the experience. She begins the session with a word of caution saying, 'Take it all with a pinch of salt'. And you draw your cards and she interprets them for you. I learned a lot. It isn't like the cards tell you your future, but it gives you a fresh perspective and seems to bring a sense of order to things.

So, given my recent dilemma with my applications and scholarships, I asked roomie to give me a reading. And today morning, just before leaving for work, she read my cards for me. I'm not sure how much this reading helped. It did bring a sense of order to things. And it also made me stop and think about things too.

Am I ready to do my PhD? My first draw was The Fool. I can't find her particular tarot set on the net, but this is approximately what it looks like.

"At #0, the Fool is the card of infinite possibilities. The bag on the staff indicates that he has all he need to do or be anything he wants, he has only to stop and unpack. He is on his way to a brand new beginning.
As a card, the Fool ultimately stands for a new start. When it turns up the Querent might be about to make a move, not just to a new home, but new job, new life. There's more than just change, renewal, and a brand new beginning in the Fool, there's also movement, a fresh, exciting new time."
"If the Fool appears at the beginning of your reading (as the cards are placed in a spread) it may indicate that you are about to embark on an experience for which you are not suitably prepared. The Fool, appearing towards the early part of a reading, suggests enormous enthusiasm, but little pragmatic experience. This “early” Fool brings an insouciant and light-hearted approach to life. This Fool may bring you more “joie de vivre” as well as a more relaxed attitude. "

According to her, any way I go, its going to be okay. This is a good time to begin new things, whatever they may be.

"The Fool, however, almost always stands for the Querent (Querent = me, the one who asks the questions) alone, no one else. In standing for the Querent, the Fool represents a time of newness, a time when life has been "re-started" as it were. The person feels that they are back at Zero, whether that be in romantic affairs, or career, at their job or intellectual persuits. [sic]

And when I think about it, the PhD not working out and me having to rethink it, does in one way seem like a breath of fresh air to me. I have always been nervous about going in for the PhD. This stumble and the option of backing out of PhD doesn't seem so bad. I can't say I'm happy about it, but I feel like its not entirely a bad thing.

"Far from being sad or frustrating, the Querent feels remarkably *free*, light hearted and refreshed, as if being given a second chance. They feel young and energized.
In addition, they likely have no idea where they're going or what they're going to do. But that doesn't matter. For the Fool, the most important thing is to just go out and enjoy the world. To see what there is to see and delight in all of it."

Yeah, thats me...

But the card carries a little bark of warning as well.

"A Fool can be a Fool. This is the card likely to turn up when a Querent is thinking of investing his money in a new, "sure fire" business. Or when the Querent is sure that it's "love this time!" Like the Fool, they're so busy daydreaming of what might be that they're ignoring what is. They're about to fall right off a cliff. Time for them to listen to that watchful little dog, which might be a concerned friend, a wise tarot reader, or just their instincts."

I asked more questions. More cards read, more warnings, more encouragement.
It didn't give me my answer, it didn't make me feel much better. But I'm still glad I did it. There is some sense of what I need to do to get my answers.

To read about The Fool, you can go here, and here too.

thinking out aloud

2008-03-31T05:36:00.005+01:00

My application for a scholarship for my PhD was turned down. Its a big disappointment because its a really generous research award and would have meant that I wouldn't have to raise resources from any other source.

So now, I am left pondering my options:

Option A:
Go in for the Master's course for now. I can get a fairly generous funding for this , in all probability. And then apply for a PhD, not just in the current not-so-great-but-not-bad-either univ but also in other good univs.
Not so nice things: There is a slight 5% chance that this schol may also not work out.
My route to a PhD now gets longer by a year.
Our (T & me) stay in UK now gets longer by a year. Its not like we had a plan to 'get out' of UK, this just becomes a constraint.
Nice things: I did want to do a second Masters. Mainly because I was intimidated by a PhD and wanted to do more taught courses in my area of specialisation. So I get that.
The Univ is only an hour from where T is, so we're together.

Option B:
Go in for the PhD. Fund myself for a year and apply in the second year for same said scholarship, and hope that it works out.
Not-so-nice things: Shelling the money out for the first year.Feel guilty about getting Appa to pay for this.
And then afterwards, schol may not be successful even in the second year/ In which case, it becomes a constant struggle to raise funding , for THREE long years.
Nice Things: The ball's rolling, with regard to my PhD.
I could do a part-time PhD. Lower fees, and I can work part-time.
Also trying to figure out - if I come in to the UK as a dependent ('depending' on T), then am I still an 'overseas' student who has to pay the exorbitant fees? If not, and I can be considered as 'home' student, fees get reduced by half.
T & I get to be together

Option C:
I have admission in good-univs for Masters. So if funding for these work out, and if I'm not going to do PhD, I might as well do a Masters in good-univ
Nice Things: I get to do Masters in good univ with focus on my area of specialisation
Not-so-nice things: The 'good'ness of the univ may not be enough to make up for living away from T and us meeting up only over weekends.

Option D:
Start Google Ads in my blog and plead you all to Click-Click-Click like Mad-Mad-Mad and help me fund my PhD.

Sigh.. I tell myself that in the grander scheme of things, this is just a minor bump in the road. Yeah well.. Cold comfort.

2008-03-30T07:52:00.003+01:00

I cry easily. When I feel misunderstood or I finding something unfair or because I feel so helpless. Sometimes its because I feel overwhelmed or touched by someone or something. I don't understand why I have to hide my tears. Why, when I watch a movie with someone, I have to bite my teeth and use all my strength to hold the tears back, lest I embarass myself.

I watched Talk to Her a couple of days back. Its an exquisite movie. I cried while I listened to this song. I felt like the song just moved all over my body and wrapped itself around me.

Softly the night wind singing
Tells me it's bringing my love to me
With every breath it's sending
Love never ending across the sea
My heart and I are trying
To keep from crying
But we are lonely
Fly little bird go winging
And please lead him home safely to me

Cucurrucucu Paloma
Cucurrucucu Paloma
Bring him back to me forever
Let us always be together

What good is my tomorrow
When filled with sorrow just like today
I need him here to hold me
Here to enfold me, always to stay
So little bird please find him
And then remind him I am so lonely
Fly little bird, go winging
And please lead him home safely to me

Cucurrucucu Paloma
Cucurrucucu Paloma
Bring him back to me forever
Let us always be together

Cucurrucucu
Cucurrucucu
Cucurrucucu
Let us always be together

I'd like to believe that I have Spanish blood in me. My name has a Spanish origin, so that's a start. I'd love to learn Spanish. I know I'll like it. I imagine myself , writing a book about myself and my love for Spanish, beginning like this.
'Sometimes I feel guilty about my love for the language. The kind of guilt that one feels when you love another woman more than you love your own mother. I feel like I'm trying to run away from my roots..."

Or something like that.... :)

'FAT' PEOPLE- Stop consuming too much oxygen I say!

2008-03-26T06:48:00.003Z

HS , who is on my Gtalk list, had this as her status message:

"If FAT ppl lost some weight, there would be more space in Mumbai locals!!!Maybe we should bring in regulations tooo, just like the European countries!!"

So initially, I thought I'd just mess with her. But over the course of this chat, I fluctuated from being amused to disbelief to sheer astonishment to I-don't-know-what.

me: thats a really nasty status msg HS!
HS: But its true
plus there are no fat ppl in my list.
me: smart
HS: :)
me: perhaps thats indicative of an inherent bias against FAT ppl
HS: well, maybe.. i understand if someone is fat because of a health problem, i acutally know some like that
bt there are ppl who are just fat, without any reason
and research has indicated taht it dulls the brain
so basically, its good if they actually reducve
maybe they consume more oxygen etc etc
me: yeah but with some ppl, they try and try and it doesnt work
its in their genes
and also, its a free country
HS: yeah, so health problm like i said, i understand
bt its frustrating to see ppl who can lose eight, remain fat.
me: if they want to be fat and have no problems with it, then its their choice and we shd just accept that
HS: i know its tough to differentatiate, bt atlesat they can try.
me: you cant force a fat person to lose weight
HS: ok they can be fat, but dont occupy so much of space then
how do the eu countries do it
its better for their health too na
its nt u are asking them to commit suicide.
me: well that's patronising. you cant force someone to be concerned abt their own health
in that case you shd have some ban on chocolates and cigarettes and alcohol
HS: applying that logic, u cant force anyone to do anything.
me: no you cant
HS: no ... they just need to keep a check
me: but that's their choice
maybe they like being fat. they may be well aware of the associated problems with it, but they choose to live with those problems, whatever that may be.. thats an informed choice that they make. just like a person makes a choice to smoke depsite reading the instruction on the packet , and chooses to drink
11:15 you cant force them to lose weight or not smoke or not drink
HS: my point, keep ur choices at a pvt level..dont make it affect others..
if u smoke..and it affects me, i think i shld have the right to tell that other that he is killing me.
he can smoke in his own quarters and i care a damn
similarly, be fat, i am not bothered
bt if u wanna travel in locals and occupy gen space, then lose weight,
i mean, u have limited space ya
me: so you're proposing some kind of weight bar for ppl to travel on local trains?
HS: yeah
it'l help for sure
on an avg ther are like 10 fat females everyday in each compartment of the train
imagine the numebr of trains running
and imagine the number of fat ppl!
me: so?
HS: there wld be what a maaax 10 percent health related issue...
me: you shd be asking for more trains than
HS: the rest are fat becuase they choose to be..
me: *then
HS: thats nt possible
why imcrease imfrastructure at some ppl's cost!
maybe they can have a special train for fat ppl
me: yeah so basically it boils down to improving the infrastructure rather than denying a person something simply becasue they are fat
HS: yeah maybe, so fat ppl shld be charged extra fees
me: and even if you put a weight bar (which i dont agree with in the firs place) how do you think you're going to differentiate bw persons who are fat because they dont have a choice, ppl having some health problem and the rest fo the fat ppl
HS: well, a flimsy solution: a health certificate
and maybe they shld have a weighing machine at the ticket coubnter...
the railway ppl are quite efficient here u know.
public transport is quite impressive..
me: okay so everytime you want to go from andheri to colaba, you have to show a health certificate
yeah i'm sure itis
HS: so it can be a small paper na
just like u have ur i card... u can have a health i card.
which u renew every pd.
me: which says that I'm fat becuase i dont have a choice, so pls dont discriminate
HS: correct.
me: do you realise that you're just adding to another kind of discrimination ? dont we enough already
HS: bt fat is not good heatlh wise.
eventually this is for the greater goood.
me: sooe ppl are black. some are yellow. some are white.some fart a lot. some stink. some are thin. some are fat... we just have to live with that
oh god
what abt stinky ppl then. ppl with bad body odour?
and ppl with halitosis
dont you think we shd have special trains for them also
or charge them extra?
it would be for the greater good after all...

She later send me this link and told me she'd send me research papers to read. Am I looking forward to that !

2008-03-25T05:17:00.003Z

I have an unhealthy reading habit. When I start on a book, I'm hooked on to it. Especially in the morning. I don't particularly like mornings, which is why I make sure I drown myself in a book the whole morning !

When I wake up, I tell myself I'll read one chapter and then get out of bed. So I read a chapter. Then I read as I walk into the bathroom, while I put paste on my brush. I read while I brush my teeth. I read while I'm waiting for the milk to boil. And then I put it down for a brief 10 seconds as I get my coffee together. I read while I wait for the bread to toast. And then I set my book aside while I take my coffee and toast to the living room and read the paper. A quick glance through the headlines, the international news and of course, the cartoon strips.

My coffee's still not over. So I'm back with my book. Read read read, sip sip sip. I'm not a morning person, but those are definitely one of the best times in the day for me. Just me, my book and my coffee.

And then its time for a bath. Nope, I do not put my book away. After years of practice, I now have an extremely efficient and intricate system whereby I can read AND have a bath. It requires careful balance and extreme multi-tasking skills.

After that, I have to get ready, and except for the 5-10 seconds when I have to pull the t-shirt/top/salwar over my head, I have my eyes glued to my book all the while.

I read for a while more. 'One more chapter, I tell myself.' And I'm one chapter down. And then I think, 'Okay, I'll read half of the next chapter'. 10 minutes later. 'Might as well finish this chapter'... 'Hmmm, just one more, last last chapter.'
And sometimes, the only reason I don't finish the book is because I want to save some for the next morning.

And God forbid I take the book with me to work !

Guest Posts !

2008-03-18T04:04:00.004Z

I had asked Anon 1 and Anon 2 to do one of the tags as a guest post. They did, they really did. Thank you very much. So here you go ! My first guest bloggers!

Introducing Ms. L. She's our Lulu (of I'm-a-Tiger-fame) and if she's in the right mood (==a few vodkas down) she will render you a classic unforgettable performance of the song . She's sassy, short-haired and splendid. A budding chef; anytime you're in a mood for home-cooked food, head to her place. She likes hectic days at work. Days that are made hectic only because she wastes most days doing nothing and leaves everything for the last minute.
If she has a headache, its a tumour. If she has an itch, its a fatal rash. If she has a pain in her toe, its arthiritis.
Her favourite line: I need a smoke
What turns her on: The health faucet helps..

Over to L:
tags are difficult miss tarantismo. attempted some of the questions. I guess I have the privilege of skipping.it was written in a hurry. may re do it

What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
had an affair with a 37 year old guy, managed a project on my own without him, lived with a roommate, discovered my anal side, had friends around ,

Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
didn’t really make any and didn’t keep any

did anyone close to you give birth?
no, but my little sister is delivering babies and the thought of it makes me feel very warm inside

did anyone close to you die?
no

what countries did you visit?
none

what would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
healthier lifestyle- at least thinking of it for the first time.

what date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
December 26th is what I can think of immediately

what was your biggest failure?
Being less patient with my parents

did you suffer illness or injury?
mental anxiety from balancing too many things and making decisions- does that count?
what was the best thing you bought?
the camera though I’m bored of it now, random things for my sister

whose behavior merited celebration?
my mother , for trying to be open about things

whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
the 37 year old guy, the difficult to talk to at times boyfriend

where did most of your money go?
Eating out. ISD phone calls,random knick knacks

what did you get really, really, really excited about?
dumbtionary nights

what song will always remind you of 2007?
Love song to a stranger- joan baez
compared to this time last year, are you:
richer or poorer? richer
happier or sadder? Much happier.
thinner or fatter? FATTER.

what do you wish you’d done more of?
been more patient and less escapist, spent money on things I can remember

what do you wish you’d done less of?
been less needy and desperate

how will you be spending christmas?
2007? With family, with wine and cranky people
2008? Don’t know

did you fall in love in 2007?
yes but maybe it wasn’t love. Will figure out in time

how many one-night stands?
a one year long one night stand

what was your favorite tv program?
desperate housewives

do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No

what was the best book you read?
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie- Half of a Yellow Sun

what was your greatest musical discovery?
roomie’s loud playlists are nice.

what did you want and get?
Money. Independence, friends

what did you want and not get?
travel, new experiences

what was your favorite film of this year?

what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
far far away in a no phone working zone. In one room with parents and siblings. But a cake that amma managed to cart and candles and even a cutting knife with a ribbon around it

what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
being able to make decisions an be sure about something

how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
the skirts and glass bangles went out I think

what/who kept you sane?

friends, sister, t

what did you miss?
t , delhi,

And now, Ms. A.
Aka Ms Independence, she is a dynamic lady, constantly on the look out for pathbreaking earth-shattering innovations and ideas. She's vibrant, vivacious and vigorous. Her strong sense of justice sets her apart. With her famous head-tilt and smile, she can even make the waters of an ocean part. Her sense of fashion is always a few steps ahead and I believe it was she who introduced leggings to Chennai. She's a sucker for puppies and kittens and stray dogs and can sometimes be quite the puppy herself.
Her favourite line: Are you serious? / Are you for real?
What turns her on: Crocodiles

From the horse's mouth.

What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
- cried in public!!!!
- felt so sure about someone.
- shared an appt. with N and did all the awesome (little and big) things you do when you get to function as a couple!

Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Don’t really make any specific New Year resolutions, but I do make resolutions throughout the year as and when warranted and those I think I’ve sort of stuck to.

did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes, my cousin who stays in my appt. building and I play with the baby almost everyday.

did anyone close to you die?
No, and I’m glad for it.

what countries did you visit?
None whatsoever, but visited US and UK in Jan 2008 (though that doesn’t count I suppose).

what would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
Travel to foreign countries, to see more new things that I can only imagine and see in pages of books as of now. Also, on a more personal level, be less argumentative and more simpatico.

what date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
hmmm, nothing specific, just June and Dec months when my brother came to visit.

whose behavior merited celebration?
My family, and always N!

whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Hmmm mine, I think?

where did most of your money go?
Traveling home almost every weekend, wining and dining out!

what song will always remind you of 2007?
‘read my mind’ The Killers
”Trees” Marty Casey

compared to this time last year, are you:
richer or poorer? Poorer.
happier or sadder? Definitely happier.
thinner or fatter? FATTER.

what do you wish you’d done more of?
Traveling, working out, eating healthy for sure, being more amicable

what do you wish you’d done less of?
Being argumentative!

how will you be spending christmas?
2007? With parents and brother and close family friends.
2008? ?!

what was your favorite tv program?
I can call whatever is going on RIGHT NOW on TV, my favourite program. So, basically almost everything. I can tell what I would never call my favourite program though…..TNA Wrestling.

do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No

what was the best book you read?
I have a particular affinity to short stories, so ‘birthday stories’ compiled by Murakami was good. Also, ‘Villa Incognito’ Tom Robbins was a damn good read.

what was your greatest musical discovery?
A bunch of really old tapes that my dad recorded from the FM signals his ship picked up while docked, from different parts of the world, way before I was even born. And the amazing part is that THEY STILL WORK!

what did you want and get?
Living with N, Money. Independence, friends

what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If I could only just let things be and suppress this innate urge to try to figure EVERYTHING out.

what/who kept you sane?
My family and N, for sure!!!!!

which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Vanessa Paradiso

Who/what did you miss?
My Ammachy, my brother….

tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
I’ve had more realizations than life lessons :
- Realized that NOT everything can be talked about in an adult manner and resolved immediately. Some things just need time to be swept under carpets and blocked out.
- Realized that the little things that bug me, in the larger scheme of things, are just so insignificant!!
- In most corporate office stupid ass kissers move up the ladder faster than the sharp, able ones.

quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I’ve had many songs that sing different parts of my year, so I’m just going to put two here.
The first is the one for most of my 2007.

”…There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.
It's easy..."

The second is for when my persecution complex kicks in:

“…They'll stone you when you're trying to be so good
They'll stone you just like they said they would
They'll stone you when you're trying to go home
They'll stone you when you're there all alone….”

Tagged again!

2008-03-14T07:29:00.006Z

Tis the season for tags!
Chakli tagged me with this - Posts in my blog that fit in the following categories - Family, Friend, Yourself, Your Love and Anything You like.

Family - This was from the time Aa and Amma came and stayed with me in Bangalore.

Friends - Though I didn't finally go to Chennai that day, it was nice to get excited with L . And this one, more because of the really sensible and supportive comment from a certain someone.

My Love - Since T hasn't figured too much in my blog so far, this one sums up what I used to feel about my love interests

Myself - Practically all the posts in this blog qualifies !

Anything I like - This one , VERY VERY MUCH. This one, about the months of the year, because I it really is true for me! Except May may not really be a 'gentle' month this year considering D-day's in May !

2008-03-12T05:53:00.009Z

what did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Met my husband-to-be :) Resigned from my job. Lived on my own. Became a teacher.

Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
almost & yes.

did anyone close to you give birth?
No.

did anyone close to you die?
My grandmother.

what countries did you visit?
Ummmmmm.I got a US visa. So that's progress

what would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
Exercise.

what date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Aug 2007. That's when I knew about T.

what was your biggest achievement of the year?
Quitting my job. Getting my first publication. Conning T into getting engaged to me.

what was your biggest failure?
Not telling my manager what I really thought of him. What a miserable pain he was and how his 'irresistible urge to help me' (yes, I'm quoting him), did more damage than he can ever imagine.

did you suffer illness or injury?
Nope. But my year in the corporate world did pave the way for some illnesses down the line though.

what was the best thing you bought?
My laptop. A strapless dress from Mango.

whose behavior merited celebration?
My brother.

whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
People in my office.

where did most of your money go?
Eating out. Flights home.

what did you get really, really, really excited about?
Emails from T every morning.

what song will always remind you of 2007?
Promiscuous, Nelly Furtado & Timbaland

compared to this time last year, are you:
richer or poorer? Poorer.
happier or sadder? Much happier.
thinner or fatter? FATTER.

what do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercising, saving

what do you wish you’d done less of?
Putting up with nonsense from nasty people

how will you be spending christmas?
2007? With parents and brother AA.
2008? With T

did you fall in love in 2007?
Oh yes

how many one-night stands?
ZERO

what was your favorite tv program?
Didn't have TV

do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No

what was the best book you read?
The House of the Spirits, Isabelle Allende

what was your greatest musical discovery?
That I can't play the guitar.
Fleetwood Mac

what did you want and get?
Money. Independence.

what did you want and not get?
travel.

what was your favorite film of this year?
Pan's Labyrinth

what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Midnight, I opened T's gifts and cried like a baby because they were so sweet and perfect. Spent the day at work. Afternoon with T and Amma. And then dinner with T.

what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not having fought with Av.

how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
Same as 2005 which was same as 2004 which was the same as 2003 which was the same as 2001 which was...

what/who kept you sane?
L & my parents.

which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Natalie Portman.

what political issue stirred you the most?
The communal tension in Bangalore. My first experience seeing it first-hand. It was scary.

what did you miss?
My brother. My cousin. College life.

who was the best new person you met?
T.

tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
Money's not everything. You can earn 1/10 what you were earning before and still be a hundred times happier because you're doing what you like.

quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"...If your life was bad to you,
Just think what tomorrow will do.
Dont stop, thinking about tomorrow,
Dont stop, it'll soon be here,
Itll be, better than before.."

Lots of fun doing this. I made sure I didn't think too much before answering. do it , just write the first thing that comes to your mind. I tag Grail, hoping this will cheer her up. Anon1 & Anon2 , would you guys please honour me with a guest post and do the tag? Please? It would mean a lot.

Tagged by Grail

2008-03-11T09:33:00.002Z

(Almost) 8 Things I am passionate about

1. I hate littering and people who litter. Passionately.
2. Food
3. Books & poems
4. My family
5. Words
6. Music

8 Things I want to do before I die

1. Visit Macchu Picchu
2. Learn French &/or Spanish
3. Cooking
4. Send my parents off on a second honeymoon
5. Be a little less impatient, a little more tolerant and a lot less irritable
6. Travel travel travel

8 Things I say often

1. SHADDUP/SHUT UP YOUR MOUTH
2. YEAAAAAAAH? (I sort of sing it out, like a good Mallu)
3. CHEEEE (like a good mallu, again)
4. HEY. (When I meet people, when I answer the phone, when I send a msg. That's always the first thing)
5. HAPPY DAYS. (Thanks to A, who started it.)
6. I'M HUNGRY. (Because I always am)

8 Books I've read recently

1. Catch 22
2. Musicophilia
3. Short Stories by Saadat Hasan Manto
4. Worldly Philosophers , Robert Heilbroner
5. Catcher in the Rye
6. Just started on Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood

8 songs I could listen to over and over

1. Tiny Dancer, Elton John
2. Both Sides, Now, Joni Mitchell
3. Tambourine Man, Bob Dylan
4. In My Life, The Beatles
5. Love Song to a Stranger, Joan Baez
6. Get Back, The Beatles
7. Release Me, Oh Laura :)

Whew
Thats it for now ...

Tangled Up

2008-03-07T07:24:00.003Z

A couple of days back, at Yoga class , in an attempt to do this

I ended up with
-my butt pointed straight up,
-my feet rested on the ground on either side of my head AND
- my head staring straight at my crotch.

Turns out that's also an asana too. A pretty difficult one at that. I couldn't stop giggling when the instructor told me this and the only reason I bit my lips to stop laughing was because she said I could hurt myself if I didn't breath correctly.

Thank god no one had a camera, coz I must have been looking really stupid!

For it's a fool who plays it cool by making his world a little colder

2008-02-28T03:51:00.006Z

Some people just leave me with a bad taste in my mouth.

To them, I'd like to say, I pity you. I pity you for what you have become. I pity you for all the bitterness you carry with you. I pity you for the arrogance you need to deal with the bitterness.
For your sake, I hope there is no such thing as karma. For your sake, I hope what goes around doesn't come around.
Because if it does, then you're in for quite a beating.

Ass Like That

2008-02-26T06:02:00.002Z

Southways has been doing some recycling from her old blog, and I thought it was a good idea. This is something I wrote a long time ago, 2 years back, in my very first blog.

I check out people's asses.. ya ya i know, almost every one does that.. But i can actually arrive at a fairly good approximation of a person's character just by looking at their ass. In fact I have this whole theory that I 'm trying to test. Is it a person's ass that determines his/her character or is it that their ass is shaped by their character?? I know its a little hard to digest but trust me, there really is some correlation .. i don't know which direction the relation runs that's what i'm trying to find out.. AND PLEASE NOTE THAT I VIEW THESE ASSES CLOTHES, not naked... just so that you don't think i'm some kind of twisted pervert..

let me elaborate.. have you noticed men with these flabby , yet barely there, sort of asses.. their ass is small but noticeable.. well they're usually the creepy kind.. or not very reliable.. but if a man has no ass, completely flat, then there's two possible conclusions. They're either a lot of fun to be with, intelligent, happy go lucky or they're the really irresponsible sort.. It'll be either of these two extremes. And if the guy has this really neat little ass that sort of makes it seem like the trousers were tailored for him , its definitely a good sign.. Usually the quiet , well organised sort..

There are lots more in between cases. I still haven't perfected it but I have a lot of faith in it...

The Pill

2008-02-21T09:32:00.005Z

L & A & I went for gynecological check-up a couple of days back.

It was quite an interesting day.
For one, we got to compare our weights**. Then we had to pee into a little bottle following which we got to compare the colour of our pee as well.

**I have put on a whopping 4 kilos. Till now, I was one of those lucky people who could eat and eat and eat and not put on weight. But not anymore. The evil eye has been cast and I am now, slowly, but steadily accumulating fat. And it doesn't help that I love eating and can happily polish off an entire bottle of mayonnaise within a week. (It was eggless, so that's some comfort).

Anyway, when I told the gynae that I was getting married soon, she asked if I wanted advice on contraception. Why not, I thought. After ruling out the Copper T (since it's best used after having one child atleast) , she said my next best option was to go on the pill. According to her, it is "absolutely safe" and the only side-effects that she mentioned was nausea in the initial period.

I'm very very sceptical about going on the pill. From what I read online, there is no mention of any drastic side-effects besides weight gain and nausea. But I just feel that popping an alien substance on a DAILY basis into my body can't really be very good in the long run. And I've also heard stories about long term side-effects but nothing that really points to the pill specifically. L's aunt who's a gynae says its absolutely fine, especially with the low dosage pills that are now available. But still , I wonder how good an idea it is.

Do take the vote.

The Mysterious Semicolon

2008-02-21T04:21:00.004Z

Ragu was one of the most infamous profs in college. An absolute terror, he was (is?) the academic equivalent of a brutal cold-blooded sadistic brain-eating Hannibal Lector. And for whatever reason, he had a particular dislike for Mallus. His tutorials were an hour of holding your breath, hoping, praying he would ignore you and not have some twisted question or cutting remark to make.

During one such tense tutorial, after looking through Mallu boy's essay, this is what he had to say "You're too young to use semicolons". GULP. Afterwards, I've thought twice before using even a full-stop in whatever I submit to him.

Anyhow, it was this article that brought back the memory. I think it's true. We're never really taught when to use a semi colon. Atleast I've never quite figured it out.

Dakshin Chitra & Crocodile Park

2008-02-20T07:02:00.010Z

So the last last weekend, as part of things that I need to do before I get married, L&A&me made a roadtrip to Dakshin Chitra followed by Crocodile Park and Mahabalipuram.

Dakshin Chitra was a bit of a disappointment. Its a wonderful concept but the place seems to be stagnating.

Crocodile Park was the most fun. We saw lots and lots and lots of crocodiles and angry hissing snakes and also got to watch the snakes being milked.

Crocodiles are possibly the most laziest animals I've seen (after me, that is). These guys just crawl out of the water and plop themselves right on top of each other. So you'll have one crocs head on the other's tail, a tail on someone's body, a paw on someone's snout and they just don't seem to mind as you can see.

Even though there was a nasty stink in the place because of the bird shit, the crocodiles and these sign boards kept us more than entertained.

I love the patient alligator, holding his breath and testing the hunter's patience.

And that horse is absolutely bewildered and so is the rider !

Meet Jaws 3. He's the largest saltwater crocodile bred in captivity.

I thought he seemed a little lonely, but then I read this :
"The Madras Crocodile Bank is anxious to add Jaws III's genes to its gene pool. But Jaws III seems to have decided otherwise. Two attempts were made to introduce a female saltwater Crocodile into Jaws III's pit. On both occasions Jaws III attacked and killed the smaller female Crocodile."
You can read more here

what do i do ?

2008-02-19T10:53:00.002Z

I've written this before I know. But I just don't know what to write here. Blog fatigue? I don't know. I find myself thinking about what I'm going to write before I write it. And in the process, the post is lost.
Manjadi's gone and closed her blog. I'm wondering what to do..

You're not crazy, just a little unwell....

2008-02-15T03:56:00.000Z

You're Mrs. Dalloway!

by Virginia Woolf

Your life seems utterly bland and normal to the casual observer, but
inside you are churning with a million tensions and worries. The company you surround
yourself with may be shallow, but their effects upon your reality are tremendously deep.
To stay above water, you must try to act like nothing's wrong, but you know that the
truth is catching up with you. You're not crazy, you're just a little unwell. But no
doctor can help you now.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Week that was

2008-02-11T15:47:00.000Z

In order to reward myself for having got some long-pending things done and over with, I told myself that the last week would be a week of good old rest and relaxation. Now I'm not very sure how much relaxation I got, but it was definitely a rewarding week.

Monday was pretty lazy. L generously send across some yummy pork curry. So roommate and I watched Desperate Housewives while devouring pork curry and idiyappam. Mmmmm

Tuesday was cooking day. Roommate taught me how to make beef fry (very easy but lots of chopping to be done). So over a dinner of beef fry and dal and tomato pickle, we watched some more episodes of Desperate Housewives

Wednesday was almost looking like more Desperate Housewives but it was finally a night-out with L. I got superbly drunk and we asked each other questions, things that cannot be written about and things that I cannot believe I answered with absolutely no inhibitions. I also got to see some interesting sights too :)

Thursday was movie marathon night. Roommate and I went for Taare Zameen Par and then Golden Compass. Almost 6 hours of movie watching. TZP is pretty good except for when Aamir Khan overacts and can't stop crying. Golden Compass was a huge disappointment. The dialogues are shoddy and predictable and Nicole Kidman is now officially DESPERATE for roles. . Thankfully a lot of the scenes were cut and so we were not subjected to seeing the entire movie.

Friday evening, after meeting up with some old batchmates who were in town, I met L & A for dinner at the Korean restaurant. I'm quite bored of Korean food , so the highlight of the evening wasn't really that. Instead it was the most wonderful thing since Nestle chocolates with stickers in them. Even better actually.
Ladies and gentlemen (if there are any gentlemen reading this) , introducing Kinder Joy. Not only is Kinder Joy the most delicious chocolate, they also come with a little surprise inside - a do-it-yourself toy. And so far everything we've got have been absolutely ingenious! We discovered Kinder Joy recently and look at what I've collected so far.

This fellow is not only a cute turtle (oops, sorry, snail. I stand corrected!), he also makes himself useful by doubling up as a lock. The little green leaf is the key.

And this ever-so scary dragon glows in the dark !!

Anyway, that was the highlight of Friday evening for me ! Besides of course the lovely company and entertainment of L&A :)

Saturday is another post by itself!

On Birthdays

2008-02-08T06:14:00.000Z

What's a birthday anyway? Its just something created by Archies/Hallmark to sell more cards. Its no big deal..

That's what I hear a lot of. And there was a time when I did subscribe to that as well. That birthdays are just another day and they're no big deal. But despite thinking like that, I'd still be excited when my birthday was around the corner, I'd still look forward to it. On my birthday a couple of years back, I remember waiting after class for ex (who was an 'anti-birthday' person) to pick me up. And when he came, I was secretly hoping for a birthday wish. But there was none, atleast not then. And I had to remind myself that 'hey birthdays are no big deal, its just another day'. There was definitely a tinge of disappointment, however much I tried to resist it. And when I got roses from someone else (absolutely thrilled), and still no wishes from ex , I was quite pissed-off.

So yes, Archies/Hallmark and all that may be making a sacks of money because of birthdays. But that doesn't mean that the day needs to be trashed completely. To me a birthday is like a gentle reminder telling me to be grateful for what I have. When its someone else's, then birthdays give an occasion for me to stop and be grateful for that person and make sure that I don't take them for granted. And that's why I think birthdays are special. Just to make sure that you don't slip into the monotony of life and forget things or people that you're grateful for.

So maybe I won't buy a card, but I'll still celebrate a birthday - be it mine or someone I care for !

Cousins and Weekends

2008-02-04T04:48:00.000Z

Since her parents were out of town, I spent the last weekend with my cousin M.
M is one of my favourite cousins. She's smart, very mature for her age (she's about 16), witty and is also one of the kindest, most gentle person I've known.

On Saturday evening, we were sitting and watching t.v together. Discovery had a programme on the Bombay railway system wwhile Travel and Living was playing "Biographies:Princess Diana". Me, me, shallow shallow me. I just wanted to see pretty pictures of Princess Diana. M, after surfing through all the channels, finally settled on Discovery, to listen to how the train system in Bombay works. She'd seen it once before and found the show so interesting that she wanted to watch it again.....

In the morning, I woke up to find M eating a bowl of a cereal and engrossed in a book. She'd been up two hours back. No t.v, no computer, nothing. Just her and her book.

M also cleared the table and put everything back in the fridge while I was busy on the phone talking to T.

So if you think that today's young kids are a bunch of self-centered, ignorant, sms focussed cocky brats, not to worry, there is hope :)

-------------------------------------

On Sunday evening, another cousin of ours, R, joined us at home. She loves to cook and wanted to make us dinner. So we were all in the kitchen and helping out. That's when I noticed that R was reeking of cigarettes. When I caught some time alone with her, I told her so. She was of course suitably embarrassed and wondering out aloud how she forgot to have mint before she came....

I remember a rare occasion when a couple of us cousins, including R, went out pubbing. I was quite tipsy. Boy cousin, Ak, was smoking and I couldn't resist and took a couple of drags from him. Now I somehow feel that that incident must have left some impression on her. She saw her older cousin smoke and she felt, oh well, ___chechi does it, its okay if I do it also. I really shouldn't have done that then. Maybe R was already smoking by then. But whatever be the case, I'm sure I wasn't exactly setting a good example.

I know that when I saw my brother smoke and my cousin T smoke, it made me feel that its okay for me to do it as well. It was a justification, a sort of internal self defence every time my conscience acted up. And now, I'm sure I am that to R.

I'm wondering if I should talk to her about it. Or I could just let her be , like my brother did, and hope that she doesn't go too far.

Songs & Memories

2008-02-04T04:41:00.001Z

Since I've been so out of things to write about, I made up a tag of my own. A tag to list songs and memories I attach with them.

'All I want is a room somewhere' from My Fair Lady takes me back almost twenty years. Junior school singing competition. I can still feel the butterflies in my stomach and the eyes of our Physical Ed sir, who incidentally was one of the judges, drilling a hole into me.

'Jesus Loves me This I Know For the Bible Tells me So' reminds me of Monday morning assembly. How we consistently ruined the song, dragging it out and singing it oh-so flat...

Scatman's World & Sleeping Child reminds me of school and our excursion to Delhi. Yellow scarves, piles of sweaters and an extremely noisy bus. And there was all the tension of who's sitting with who, which gang is cooler, which boy is hitting on which girl...

James Taylor reminds me of my father. We've never needed a music system in the car.

Nirvana & Led Zeppelin reminds me of College and my forays into the world of nicotine and more.

Beatles makes me nostalgic about college and our graduation dinner. We were all huddled together in a cab and headed to some pub, very drunk and very happy and singing 'nothing's gonna change my world' like we really meant it.

Update

2008-02-01T09:49:00.000Z

Yup, for those of you who haven't already guessed it, I'm getting married. The last few months have been emotionally overwhelming and immensely hectic and I've loved every minute of it. Okay, maybe not the part where T had to leave, but it was made a little less painful because I know I'm going to see him soon.

So, where do I start? Well, my parents, like all good Mallu parents, have been on the lookout for me for a while now. My deal with my parents was that I would meet men my parents wanted me to if they were open to meeting men that I wanted to introduce to them. So I did 'meet' men , (this was a result of one of those meetings) but nobody clicked, thankfully. Well, obviously my parents beat me to it and before I knew it, I was happily engaged.

We first started with emails. The longest mails ever (i'm suddenly feeling shy about this whole thing, so I'm going to make it super quick) and then we graduated to phone calls . and then he came to India and we met, and.. and... and...the rest is history. !

Whew. thank god for statements like 'the rest is history'.

So we're going to be married, most probably in May, touch wood. YAAAAAAAAAAAAY !

P.S. I'll try and write more about it when I start feeling less shy.

2008-01-29T09:58:00.000Z

His last state of the Union address and he goes and does this.

"The US government has announced plans to open more than 3m acres (about 5,000 square miles) of Alaskan wilderness to logging, mining and road building"

And this chooth has the audacity to say this :

"Denny Bschor, Alaska regional forester who approved the Tongass plan, said it would sustain the diversity and health of the forest, provide livelihoods and subsistence for Alaska residents and ensure a source of recreation and solitude for forest visitors. "What is significant in the amended plan is our commitment to the state of Alaska to provide an economic timber sale programme which will allow the current industry to stabilise, and for an integrated timber industry to become established," he said."

How, pray tell me, how would logging-mining-roadbuilding 'sustain the diversity and health of the forest' and 'ensure a source of recreation and solitude for forest visitors' ?? Solitude, my foot.

The kind of things I've wished for George Bush, even I'm taken aback by my viciousness-potential.

But somehow this move seems like the final nail in the coffin. It looks like its all downhill from here.
Hopefully, I'm over-reacting..

2008-01-29T04:00:00.000Z

I've been sort of stressing out about what to write here. I re-started the blog and then I find myself with nothing to blog about. Its probably because things are going pretty smoothly, more or less, no terrible managers, no vague colleagues, and as far as PMS rantings go, I think T's been on the receiving end of that.

I've been working on writing a research proposal and it's not really the most exciting thing I've done so far.

Hmmm, hopefully, I can think of something interesting to blog about soon.

2008-01-21T11:56:00.000Z

"I am convinced that courage is the most important of all the virtues. Because without courage, you cannot practice any other virtues consistently. You can be kind for a while; you can be generous for a while; you can be just for a while, or merciful for a while, even loving for a while. But it is only with courage that you can be persistently and insistently kind and generous and fair."
Maya Angelou

2008-01-17T15:40:00.000Z

Have you ever watched a person's face as they stare at fireworks in the sky?

Its like looking at hope.

Finally... With apologies to Beks

2008-01-16T09:25:00.000Z

T for T , the man in my life. Yes, a lot has happened!

A for Apologies to Beks for having taken so long with this. The mind was willing but the spirit was weak.

R for Resolutions - 3 have been made, how many of these will be kept I'm not sure.

A for Applications - which are STILL going on and I'm yet to send them in.

N for Not nice when my favourite bloggers stop writing/disappear. Revenge?.

T for new T-shirt with Chorianpuzhu written across. Very nice, I like.

I for Incessantly searching for new blogs to read, but nothing matches up to the good old ones.

S for Skype which is where you'll find me every evening from 10.30 to 12.30 and for Southways who thankfully didn't disappear/stop writing.

M for the traumatic Marriage Preparation Course I went for last year. Forced down by the Catholic Church. Sex education , like you've never heard before, and a whole lot of nonsense.

O for Optimistic which is what I'm trying to be this year.

2007-07-31T05:29:00.000+01:00

Okay. I'm done here.

Thank you, everyone!

I also judge

2007-07-24T17:18:00.000+01:00

I'm an extremely judgemental person. Its pretty much an unconscious act for me, so these were just a few of things I judge that I'm AWARE of.. I'm pretty sure there are plenty more which I don't even realise..

I judge :

People who litter.

People who come to India/Kerala and act all amused/surprised because "Oh you can speak English so well"

People who misuse their mobile phones - includes speaking while driving , texting while someone is talking to you, not switching it off/setting it to silent while in church/theatre/during a talk EVEN after its rung once and you KNOW its not switched off/on silent.

People who I meet for the first time asking me my 'caste'. I don't know and how does it matter ? And if its someone who knows me who asks, then its more often than not , out of curiosity.

And I also judge myself for judging people who don't think the way I do...

I'm on the other side now.

2007-07-20T09:24:00.001+01:00

Besides all the re-studying (and this time more thoroughly) and the daunting prospect of facing a class of 50+ students , being a teacher can be quite a toughie..
For one, you can no longer bitch about some students to other students. Which is something that comes naturally to me.
Two, you can't bitch about teachers to the students .. Obviously not.
And three, I don't think you can bitch about students to teachers. Okay, so I can discuss performance and wonder why student X has done so badly. But that'll have to stop at that. I can't discuss my various conjectures like girlfriend issues and questions like what-does-he-see-in-her-anyway-?

All that requires a lot of self restraint and discipline. They really should pay me more..

I judge

2007-07-20T05:42:00.000+01:00

I judge people who don't think I'm perfect...

...EVIL EVIL LAUGH ENSUES....

I'm-Proud-Of tag

2007-07-19T10:44:00.000+01:00

Broom, I owe you an apology. This took way too much time and I couldn't even think of 8 things I'm proud . But the 5 that I did think of, I'm super proud of. I think I'll come back to this late if I ever do think of more things. I know there are more things I should be proud of....

Here goes.

Appa , for everything that he is. He's incredibly intelligent, very very straightforward and very very funny.

Amma , for her strength, for being able to keep her cool at all times, her energy and enthusiasm, her genuine-ness and her amazing cooking skills.

My brother. Just writing this, gets me all choked up and teary-eyed and happy. AA is every sister's dream come true..

My dad's sister O - She lost her husband very early in her marriage, was a single mom and had to stay with very nasty parents-in-law and even nastier sister-in-law. She ran a huge crumbling tharavad all on her own, managed the family property , dealt with scum-of-the-earth dealers and real estate agents and made sure that NO ONE messed with her. She's an incredibly strong woman, extremely straightforward , proud and yet humble. AND she's funny, loves to tell stories and has the most whole-hearted laugh I've ever heard .

My grandmother, my mother's mother - If I could be half, even one-tenth the woman that she was , I'd be happy. After she passed away, my mom used to have complete strangers come up to her and speak so fondly about Ammachi and how she helped them out.

AND I'm tagging myself with Broom's latest tag .... :)

This was home

2007-07-11T18:53:00.000+01:00

Some of you must be squirming seeing that unholy mess. I can assure you that there is nothing that moves in there. I grew quite fond of that messy room. This photo was taken at the end of what was a very busy week at work, so right after this, I would have gotten down to cleaning up the place..

For a year, this was home. I'll always remember this place fondly. I think I grew up quite a bit the one year I was here. Packing up was quite a task. Amma came over to help out, though it did put me in quite a spot number of times.

She found a matchbox in my old handbag.. 'What's this for? Cigarettes?'

A neat round burn mark left by cigarette, on counterpane, bed sheet and all the way through to the mattress. No questions asked on this one..

And when I was emptying the drawers, I find this small stash of weed, in a little plastic cover with some rolling paper. Leftovers from a long time back. Thankfully, Amma wasn't around. I couldn't bear to throw it away , so I stuffed it into a little perfume box and packed it away. And for the first time ever and probably the last, my parents, me and weed are all in the same room in Kottayam... Not for too long though !

holiday

2007-06-28T20:27:00.001+01:00

Tomorrow I return my laptop. And on Saturday , my broadband will be disconnected.
And then to Kottayam where the net connection is terribly slow..

So I'm not going to be blogging or bloghopping for a while.

Just the thought, and my hands are trembling and my legs feel weak.

Take care everyone !

Tavern - Wednesday night

2007-06-28T13:11:00.000+01:00

If any of you ladies are in Bangalore on a Wednesday, then please do go to in Museum Inn (before 9:00 PM).
It's Ladies' Night which means you can drink 3 taps of beer FOR FREE !
Imagine... Its not even a buy-one-get-one-free.. Its 3 free taps of beer. As simple as that.
So basically, you can walk in on a Wednesday evening, have 3 taps of beer and then walk out.. No bill, no nothing. Well, maybe a tip, but that's it !
I couldn't believe it and I actually confirmed it thrice with the waiter...

The restroom in Tavern is a tiny tiny little place. There's a little common area with a washbasin. And the loo is usually occupied so most of the time, you end up cramped in that tiny space with another woman who's also waiting. And the beer high, being away from the loud music and the sudden quiet...something...something makes these group of women not feel like strangers to each other. There's some kind of connection and somehow someone initiates a conversation. Once I was waiting with 2 other girls and I remember coming back to my seat and telling my friends that if we'd had to wait any longer , cramped together in that tiny space, then some really interesting stuff would have happened ! :)
Last night, there was another woman who was waiting, a slightly older, probably married woman. And somehow, we got onto talking about the Ladies Night and then she said 'Men are losers, the things they do to have us around, ha ha ha '!
And me, the drunk fool, readily agreed and we both bitched some more about men.
Later the lady inside joined us as well. It was all a lot of fun ! It was fun, doing all that male bashing though I didn't mean any of what I said ! Atleast not most of it!

Anyway, if not for the Ladies Night , then pay a visit to Tavern for the Ladies Room !

Post 101

2007-06-25T14:40:00.000+01:00

THAT , down there, was my 100th post...

Thank you , thank you, thank you and you and you !

2007-06-24T18:13:00.000+01:00

I wish now was last night...

Things in my butt and Zimbabwean economy ???

2007-06-22T12:12:00.000+01:00

I was reading an article about a dentist in Zimbabwe where it mentioned that the country has an inflation rate more than 3700 % .

I got pretty curious when I read that so I googled Zimbabwe + economy and was directed to a Wikipedia page.

And I was scrolling through the Wiki page when I came across one line under the section on Rhodesia era .... 'small dick in your butt'

Eh ?

EDIT : So I checked the page later , after about half an hour. And it was gone.. The "dick in your butt". The line, I mean.. I guess I was just at the right place at the right time...

Work icks

2007-06-20T04:46:00.000+01:00

Suppose you were explaining something to someone at work. Preparing some figures, graphs, trying to show a trend, explain it. And pointing out some numbers/graphs on the screen. And then that someone says, " You have such long fingers" ...

Does that ick you out ? Me, it totally did. And pissed me off as well.
And I'm wondering if I'm just being paranoid.

Sunday Pork curry

2007-06-17T19:15:00.000+01:00

This is what I made on Sunday afternoon. Its a tad too spicy, but tastes good, all the same, if I may say so myself.

I found the recipe here

bye-nocs.. (sorry, I just had to)

2007-06-17T18:45:00.000+01:00

Have binoculars been phased out ? I've been trying to get Appa a good pair of binocs for the last 2 months, but despite all my efforts, I am yet to even SEE binocs in any shop.

A couple of day's back I met my mom's father's cousin's granddaughter's husband (hee hee, I mugged that up before going to their place) who works with Carl Zeiss. He told me about a shop that deals with optical lenses, where Carl Zeiss did keep a few binoculars as well, for sale. So today evening, I dropped by at the shop and asked the sales girl if they had Carl Zeiss binoculars.

"bifocals? Yes, we have bifocals"

"No, no, binoculars"

"Yes, we have. Bifocals"

"No No. BI-NO-CULARS. Carl Zeiss Binoculars"

"Ma'am, they're called bifocals. We have Carl Zeiss bifocals, yes"

OKAY..
I think I'll have to order it off Amazon or something.

Yenjoy !

2007-06-16T11:30:00.000+01:00

Rajnikanth's new movie, Sivaji hit the screens yesterday. And its been chaos in the theatres since. There's so much hype and fanfare about this guy, it never ceases to amuse and amaze me !

Anyway, these are some hilarious Sivaji inspired lines that I heard from a friend.

" After six, there's seven, after sivaji there's heaven. "

" If sachin hits it's sixer, if sivaji hits it's stretcher. "

And here's the killer:

"If you cross chittor there's katpadi, if you cross sivaji there's dead body "

Happy Birthday Ms Independence!

2007-06-15T12:38:00.000+01:00

The three of us, (A, L and me), we've known each other since College. That makes it a little more than 7 years. And we've seen each other through a lot and put each other through a lot as well. These women have seen me cry, (one of them has MADE me cry but I still love you, L), made me laugh, they've held my hand (literally and otherwise) through some tough times, stood up for me. So basically, I am truly truly grateful that I have the two of you, anon1 and anon2.

Today is A's birthday. She is Ms.Independence, the Wild Child, the free spirit. The pretty one with many many questions and a very strong sense of justice. She's the only brave one who's touched a snake and she's also eaten dog/cat food. (all this information, thanks to a have-you-ever-quiz that we did).

A Self Portrait of 'A'

We've had our share of fights, A and me, and I don't think that's going to change much. In any case, I am really really glad AND proud to have her as a friend and I hope that even if we fight (hopefully, with decreasing frequency), we can always get over that and move on.

Happy Birthday A! Mmmmwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaah !!

snooping around

2007-06-14T19:51:00.000+01:00

Appa was having trouble accessing his Rediffmail and so he asked me to check it for him and forward any mails from AA. Of course, I did all that. And a littlebittle more. BUT OBVIOUSLY.. COME ON, I JUST HAD TO. ALL THOSE MAILS JUST STARING AT ME...

And this is what AA had written to Appa in one of his mails, around the time I had decided to quit.

"Im praying for her. Im glad that she has made a decision and is still
sane. Normally she goes into depression before and after any decision."

I was really amused when I read this. Depression? Me ? Bright-eyed-bushy-tailed me?

Well, yeah , he is right about the before part. I go into severe depression and moodiness and self-doubt and general existential angst before every decision.
After the decision, I don't really think about it much. The only reason I would get depressed is the thought of all the decisions that await.

Anyway, its very comforting that AA knows me so well. I sometimes wonder if I know him as well. All I know is, he's the bestest brother I could ever have asked for.

2007-06-12T19:49:00.000+01:00

If this (what I'm reading now) were a movie, I'd put it on fast forward and probably doze off in five minutes.

I hate abandoning a book. I think sooner or later, things will pick up , and it gets better and better as you get into the story and its all good from there.

But this... this is really testing my patience. And the last book by Eggers I read was so brilliant , that I cannot imagine that the same person wrote this...

Here, feel my pain..

"The path was now dotted with large flat rocks, like overturned dinner plates, and we were jumping from rock to rock, and doing so at a speed that I should have found alarming but somehow didn't, and we were barefoot, which might have increased the alarm but instead made it easier, because the rocks were smooth, and cool, and my bare feet would land on the rock and kind of wrap around it, simian-like, in a way that a shoe or sneaker or sandal couldn't. [that is one sentence] I swear my toes were grabbing for me, and that my skin was attaching to the rock surface in a way that only meant collusion between natural things - in this case, feet and smooth green-grey rocks. [oh puhlees, you're just a walking barefoot on rocks, don't get all back-to-nature about it] There was no time to think, which was plenty of time - I had a few fractions of a second in mid air, between rocks, to calculate the location of the next rock-landing options, the stability of each, the flattest surface among them.My brain and legs and feet all working at top speed, at the height of their respective games - it was thrilling and I was proud for them, for us. [now comes the longest sentence ever] I had the thought, while running, without breaking stride, that I would like to be doing this forever, that thought occuring while I almost landed on a very sharp rock but adjusted quickly enough to avoid it in favor of a nearby and more rounded rock , and while I was congratulating myself on having made such a perfect rock-landing choice, I was also rethinking my thought about jumping on rocks forever, because that would probably not be all that fun after a while, involving as it did a certain amount of stress, probably too much - and then, I thought , how odd it was to be thinking about running forever along the rounded gray rocks of this corner of Senegal - was this Popenguine? Mbour? - while I was in fact running along them, and how strange it was that not only could I be calculating the placement of my feet in midrun, but also be thinking of my future as a career or eternal rock-runner, and noting the thinking about that at the same time."

That was four sentences from the book.. Four painful sentences. Well okay, the thoughts are nice and all that, but its just all too self conciously casual and trying too hard to be all natural and stuff. I think there is some serious editing missing...

I oh-so want to put this book away...

Bangalore bangalore....

2007-06-11T16:37:00.000+01:00

In another three weeks , I'm no longer going to be Mind Blogging from Bangalore.

I'm going to miss Bangalore. I'm going to miss the life I had here. I remember when I was a kid how I've always longed to stay on my own and do my own stuff.. And I've got that chance and I've absolutely loved it. Yes there were days of loneliness, moments of "awful sinking feelings", Sunday evening blues. But I think it was mostly good.

I'll miss Bangalore weather. Especially considering that I'm headed to Chennai. And Bangalore is such a pretty city, if you can just forget the traffic and pollution and billboards. Some of the roads and little lanes are so incredibly pretty and quaint that a walk down those lanes does wonders to my mood !

I want to visit Cubbon park one last time before I leave, spend the evening there, like I did with J (and maybe get up close and personal with the "grass", like we did last time). I want to go for one more Bangalore walk and visit the Planetarium as well (something which has been in the list for ages now). One last meal at Sunny's
and one last book-binge at Blossom's

Sigh...

Edit : DW's comment made me realise I hadn't really told you my plans after quitting. I'm shifting back to Madras where I will be working with one of my profs as an RA/TA while I work on my applications.So I should be in Madras for a year or so.

Slurp slurp

2007-06-07T21:08:00.000+01:00

Join me in some drooling..

PMS, R.I.P ????

2007-06-06T15:50:00.000+01:00

I sent Amma this article to read 'coz I couldn't really make sense of most of it and it didn't really sound all true..
And this is what she had to say
"So they say in early days people got pregnant to avoid menses. It must be a man who wrote this, I'd rather have nine months of periods than nine months of pregnancy not to mention the puking, nausea, the gas and the weight and finally and not the least the labour pains that follows it. No wonder those days females popped of so early. Must read that piece once more. "

"must be a man who wrote this..." ha ha ha ! Bang on !

2007-06-06T08:05:00.000+01:00

It's all very good now... One wrong move and I'll lose it and it'll all get messed up and complicated.
But how I'd love a wrong move now...

2007-06-04T13:54:00.000+01:00

XKCD

2007-06-01T13:51:00.001+01:00

I feel sorry for the lift operator who has to spend his day inside a box, press buttons now and then, be in a box with people and feel completely alone.

I feel sorry for the XYZ credit-card company representative, who sits in the cafetaria the whole day, gets up when someone comes to get coffee and asks them if they'd be interested in a credit card, only to get a brusque NoThankYOu.

I feel sorry for the coffee machine operator. Its an automated machine, so he really has nothing to do. Once I saw him sitting alone in the cafeteria, staring into space, with nothing to do and no one to talk to.

They probably feel sorry for me, staring into a computer screen the whole day.

Kakkabe

2007-05-30T17:32:00.000+01:00

I'm not much of a travel writer. Not that I'm much of a writer at all. But writing about where I went and what I did reminds of the inevitable post-summer-holiday 'free writing' (as compositions were called in school) that we had to. Title "What I Did During my Summer Holidays". They used to be such a pain and after a couple of years, I had a standard "free-writing" ready to be used for all the coming years, of course, with a few changes here and there, bigger words, slightly fancier sentences.

So I'll just leave you with some pictures of Kakkabe and Jungle Mount Adventure camp. There are some more pictures, from a friend's camera which I haven't got yet. When I do get them and if they're any good, I'll put them up as well.

This is Jungle Mount Adventures Base-Camp 1 in Kakkabe. Very pretty, very very pretty...

Another bit of the camp. Kitchen on one side and a small room on the other.

There's a river that flows through the camp. Kayaking, rowing and swimming. We followed the river down its course for a while. Came across a small waterfall on the way .

We also went rappelling down a 200 feet rock face. Which was a lot of fun and rather dramatic (courtesy a slightly paranoid 'anonymous' friend. Mmmmwwaaah).

FYI

2007-05-30T17:14:00.000+01:00

I had an overdose of Arrack and now I'm feeling Tarantismic..

Have I told you about my hyperactive conscience ?

2007-05-30T10:14:00.000+01:00

I formally submitted my resignation today .

And I feel like a f***** Judas ....

I see disappointment in people's eyes and I feel like I've betrayed everyone here...

I thought I was supposed to feel happy , without a care in the world...

If only there were toggle buttons for my conscience and I could set it to zero now. Because I know that technically there is NOTHING for me to feel guilty about. Technically. But I still feel guilty.

Stupid conscience.

Running away

2007-05-28T13:45:00.000+01:00

Part of the reason why I'm quitting work is

- M makes my life miserable. And I let him manipulate me and was too chicken to stand up to him. I do hold my ground now and then but not firmly enough. I should have put a stop to it a long time back. I did try, but I wasn't firm enough.
Unable to manage the M and easily pushed around.

- I know jack-shit about all this technical stuff and I have a peer who actually picked up a whole new programming language all on his own. I feel like I'm in the wrong place.
I think I learn best from a text book. I actually READ instruction manuals. I learn best when I'm taught things. I don't think I can just pick up stuff like this on my own, just by exploring.
Unable to manage peer-pressure and easily intimidated.

So there. I'm running away from it. Running back to school. Where there are profs to help me or profs whom I can blame and juniors to make me feel good.

There. That's.the.truth. I'm.running.away.

Bizarre

2007-05-24T17:53:00.000+01:00

Millions of cars in Bangalore.....

Zillions of trees as well......

Why did it have to be this car and this tree ?
WHY WHY WHY ????

We were planning to drive to Coorg......

PS : Thankfully, no one was hurt.

2007-05-24T03:55:00.000+01:00

I talked to my parents again, and tried to reason things out with them. But, Appa wasn't in a mood for reason. The only condition he said was that he would be okay with if there was a larger group.....

So, the rest of the day was frantic, trying to convince friends from Madras to join us for the trip. By evening however, it was confirmed that neither of them would be able to come. So, that was that and I had pretty much given up on convincing my parents.

One last call to my parents. I told my dad that 'L & R can't come, does this mean you still wouldn't like me to go ?' To my pleasant surprise, Appa finally relented. His logic being that - if I didn't go, I'd be miserable, and if I DID go in rebellion, I'd still be miserable. Either way, he'd be on the receiving end !!

And I felt all warm and fuzzy inside and of course, undying love for parents mmmwaah mmmwwwaaah mmmmwaaaahs.

Yipppeeeeeee!!! And the only thing on my mind is Pork Pork Pork. Pork vindalloo, Pork roast, Pork fry , Pork sorpatel... yum yum
And yes, kayaking and swimming and all that... :)